Friday, November 3, 2017

HOW TO PREPARE FOR COACHELLA



Hi ladies and gents What's up, guys? How you guys doing today? I'm just chilling in Cedar Rapids, so yeah Today is Saturday April 7th, and I'm starting my Coachella prep. Let's backtrack for a sec Coachella is coming up April 13th through 15th or 12th through 14th or I don't give a fuck Coachella is a music festival if you didn't already know and it's basically the most annoying time of the year for everybody who's not not going, and I would know because for my entire life I've been the person who didn't go and had to watch everybody else on social media be there Yeah, it's the most annoying shit of all time. It's literally so fucking annoying. I'm like triggered because it's so Fricking annoying, but this year I am blessed enough to be actually going Being one of the annoying people I always used to like make fun of people who are at Coachella.

I'd be like haha guys you're stupid, Coachella is stupid? What the...Fuck? Like I wouldn't want to be there like I wouldn't want to be seen like all those cool artists are wearing those outfits or Eating those popsicles or like riding on the ferris wheel like I would never want to do that. Well this year I'm doing that and I'm really fucking excited about it I thought it'd be kind of fun if I documented all of the things I have to do I'm popular I thought it'd be fun if I documented all the things I had to do in order to prepare for Coachella because there's a lot, okay. It's not easy I remember when I would like look at all the girls going to Coachella I'm like wow that looks so fun like they just get to pick out their outfits and like they're all tan and their nails are Done their hair is done like wow they look so good, but there's so much more behind it than what meets the eye I'm pale my nails are disgusting look that one's broken my roots are all grown out like I'm a Mess I have so much. I have to do and I literally leave in like less than a week.

Oh yeah quick shout out to Dote because Dote is actually sending me to Coachella Let's just get right into the process Coachella prep 2018 is it 2018 I feel like it's still 2017. No. It's 2018. Okay.

That's weird What's up?! Okay, so step one hair I am getting my hair dyed because I'm just a hoe like that Basically as you can kind of probably see maybe I've like really heavy highlights, and I basically just need to get my roots done There's a fucking truck in the middle of the road and I am literally late to my appointment so it'd be really great if you didn't think that I want to die okay how am I gonna do this. Okay. We're really having you do a little detour here. Okay.

Bye Fuck it's really fucking hot in here no wonder if it's the heater is on why do I have the frickin car heater on? I'm so stupid hair is one of those things that is like if your hair looks good Everything makes sense it frames your face, and it frames your heart also I'm gonna see if she can make my whole head more blonde even though the answer is probably no because every single time I've ever Gone
and asked it been like can you guys make my whole entire head a little bit more blonde the answer has always been no because they Say that my hair is already too bleached and that all my hair will fall out and then I'll be bald so like I don't Want that then I don't know okay, my life's a mess. Yeah, yes, I will see you guys after I get my hair done I'll try to do a little bit of clips while I'm in there, but I'm just a lazy bitch, so we'll see Hi now blonde again or at least like my roots are blonde again There's a little bit of kind of feel like that line of brown, but whatever I don't give a frick I just sat in that chair for like four hours And I just need a burrito or something but should I eat a burrito probably not because Beyonce's going vegan before Coachella Okay, what's up? Guys? It's currently Sunday So the next day and today we have a new project as you know one of the most important aspects of Coachella is the outfits Duh, I've been working on my Coachella outfits for months and because of that I will not be showing them to you right now because Why would I show you them before when I'm supposed to like really Debut them on the day of the festival I won't be doing that I'm gonna be showing you a little Coachella haul some of it was sent to me by Dote some of it I bought with my own money some of it I found in the trash can Bad joke some of it. I'm gonna wear some of it. I'm not gonna wear These aren't gonna be my outfits if that makes sense.

I don't know whatever enjoy Oh, yeah, also not that you care, but I'll have like the store in the top. You. Don't give a fuck okay It's the next day, and I'm stressed one of my favorite outfits that I have planned for Coachella fucking duh, I'm obsessed with it It's like super dynamic and like interesting and like fascinating and edgy The glasses that I initially picked out for it, I realized when like shown in the light Don't match the outfit as well as I was planning basically the glasses don't match. I'm obsessed with this outfit I'm not gonna like let it go and glasses are like the most important aspect of an outfit in my opinion And so I need to freaking get some glasses right now.

I'm so I'm going to mall and I'm gonna get it And that's just where we're at that's what we're doing today and then let's just Let's just go let's just see what we can find and just see what we can do and see we can find this here we Can do ahh Hi, so we're back from the mall and Eww I literally went into probably seven stores bought a bunch of stuff that I didn't need Just stuff that I wanted for my life And I'm not gonna be showing you that because this video is about Coachella not about my life But I did find one pair of glasses and they are these They're kind of ugly they're actually really ugly and I actually immediately regret buying them and the moral story is that they're gonna bug lis like I. They're definitely ugly, and I regret them They looks better in the store, so you'll be seeing if I wear these probably not because they're a little bit fucking crusty Okay, hi. Sorry thought I'd have a little jam sesh next task nails you heard that right ladies gotta get the nails done and gents Not assuming your gender. I have acrylics my middle finger is broken.

It's been broken for like two weeks I'm not excited about to get these done by to get these beats I don't know color I'm gonna get I'm thinking I'm gonna get monochrome nails kind of like that because I think that's kind of sick kind of festival dives We'll see if they have the monochrome nails here. I think that they do or not monochrome. Yeah monochrome, or is it whatever oh? My god these hoes fucking clean bitch now give you a little montage afterwards. They came out so Flippin cool.

I should clean for Coachella Kill me okay Hey guys Hey guys probably gonna hit this car right here Don't really hit this car early in the mood for that today, but today is the last day before I leave for Coachella I'm doing pretty good. I only have a few more things, but I do have quite a few things I have to do to it. First of which is a juice cleanse Now you guys are probably like Emma really, and I don't mind you I'd be saying the same thing I'm doing a juice cleanse today because so many people do juice cleanses before Coachella I don't know why I originally wasn't gonna do one. I just like did it didn't even cross my mind, but last night I was at the gym trying to get ripped you know and I felt kind of shitty you know and you like eat a lot Of food, and you just feel really like full, but like sick at the same time I don't know how to explain the feeling it's not good though And so I was like how the fuck am I gonna make this feeling go away Then I saw on somebody's Instagram Story that they were doing in juice cleanse and I'm like I bet doing a juice cleanse would make me feel less like shit now here we are driving to the press juicery.

I'm only doing a one day juice cleanse because honestly I don't think I could do a Longer than one day juice cleanse cuz I love food way too much I'm leaving for Coachella tomorrow And I'm also uploading this video tomorrow meaning that I have to have this video done by tonight meaning that I can't give you guys An update because I'll still be doing the cleanse while I'm uploading this video if that makes sense I thought okay well then then Emma. Why are you even showing you doing a juice cleanse if you're not gonna talk about it Well, here's what I'm gonna do I'm going to do a little taste test of all the juices that I'm gonna have to drink today? And then I'm just going to talk about how they taste even though I'm not gonna talk about the effects of the juice cleanse You're probably like Emma. What are you gonna do about coffee if you can't drink coffee today, bitch. Don't worry I happen to be drinking coffee while I do this juice cleanse I know you're not supposed to drink anything But the juice like you're not supposed to have caffeine you're not supposed to have alcohol That's an issue for me cuz I'm 2 years old, but I don't give a literal fuck.

Can you not ride my ass? Comment down below if you want me to vlog at Coachella   I forgot I was filming fuck Hey guys just got to the press juicery can't wait so excited to see what happens, I'll see you guys once I have my juice Hey my juice got my press freeze this is like my favorite food this and burritos favorite food also
So dope we go to press Juicery so much that I had enough points to get 15% off of my juice cleanse How awesome kind of nervous for this juice cleanse because what if I have to drink a whole juice that tastes like shit I bet That's gonna happen the lady said that you should start your juice cleanse at like 8:30 a.M.. It's 11:30 a.M. So I'm three hours behind, but that's a-okay someone just pulled into this parking spot next to me Now I can't be myself Do you know what I'll move Jesus crisis tight spots of really fucking I can't even get in too fucking tight That's what she said. I don't want to sorry.

Oh God. Okay. Sorry for all of that confusion Let's try out the juices now you already know the drill okay. I'm gonna try these now I'm not drinking them now okay first one kale spinach romaine parsley cucumber celery apple and lemon that sounds fucking horrible.

Let's see how it tastes Well not great, but I think I'll be able to tolerate it Hopefully juice number two pineapple apple lemon mint this one will be easy let's try it out Oh, yeah This one's super nice super nice juice number three kale spinach romaine parsley cucumber what I have to drink this one twice This is the exact same one is the first one and I already know It's mediocre at best so that's juice number for this one. I'm afraid of beet apple lemon ginger I hate beets so let's see how this goes it's pretty though. Oh, this is actually not bad at all This is super pleasant okay, not too shaby. Juice number five cucumber pineapple lemon coconut water aloe vera See how it is okay, this one's ass Ew.

I think the cucumber's throwing me off ew because it's kind of bitter Ugh, no. No can't wait to drink that later the last juice is super yummy, and I know because I've had this one It's vanilla almonds dates vanilla sea salts super good, but we'll try it anyways super good damn boy. Yeah, really fucking sexy They give you two waters that you're supposed to be drinking first water They give you is this chlorophyll water, which is basically water with chlorophyll in it I think it just tastes like normal water, but I can't tell It tastes kinda weird I can't tell if it actually tastes weird Or if it's just the fact that it's green is like playing with my mind and making me think it tastes weird I don't know But something about it rubs me the wrong way Then I'm supposed to be drinking this aloe vera water right before bed because it's supposed to act as a laxative she told me so that's disturbing I don't like how that tastes at all ew you know it tastes like soap water oh This is gonna be a hard one to get down aloe vera water. Not a fan of it Okay, and then last but not least I got this wellness shot that has ginger lemon and cayenne in it this isn't a part of The cleanse this is just for funsies actually I've already had these before and I know that they taste like ass So I'm taking the wellness shot Cheers Fuck ew Not doing good yeah, this whole experience is not gonna.

Be easy. Hopefully I poop a lot I just like to give a little update and let you know that um while I was drinking one I and I was driving. I was drinking and driving, but not what you think I was drinking pressed juice not.... Alcohol anyways when I was drinking it   I gagged like really bad and like threw up a little bit This is not gonna be easy.

Okay well that's it I literally I've consumed one juice and I've already like threw up cuz it tasted bad I feel like I'm gonna throw up still so like this is not good. Okay well Hello and for the next step, I am naked I don't think you can see any of my body parts Don't want to get demonitized so I just got out of the flippin shower And it is time to fake tan because you girl is pale. I'm not gonna get spray tan today instead I'm using loving tan. This is not spons but I wish it was because I love loving tan this is ultra dark for Experience tanners only which I am because I used to do cheer and I had to fake tan all the time So let's just hop right into it.

Let's get right into it. I thought while we were tanning We could just talk about our feelings, so there's gonna be a lot of times where you can't see my face But as long as you can feel my presence. That's all that matters. Also, I have a feeling you're gonna End up seeing one of my nips at some point So we'll see.

My mirror's all fogged up Jesus Crist I'm gonna put it on my butt cheeks That's fine, this is quite the process, but I feel like usually when I do fake tan I like half-ass it cuz I'm like if it looks like shit like what ever dissever actually want it to look good so like That's what I'm really gonna try hard today. You know it's the hardest part about fake tanning getting your back It's so flippin hard might have to have my mom come in and do my back mommy Do you want me to do my back? I need assistance? Thank you mommy Also, if you guys wanted a little inside scoop the scariest part about fake tanning is doing your face guess what time it is guys It's time to do the face. I'm scared I get scared into my face. Oh shit.

That's so much great. I look good Okay, and that's it for today's video I'll see you at Coachella if you want you can follow me on Instagram and you can see all the pics right when they come out And you can follow me on Twitter because I'm gonna be tweeting about what's actually Happening rather than like Instagram where it's like what you think's happening And then Twitter is like   Or you can just wait for my Coachella vlogs to come out where you can see the vlogs so we're really gonna be documenting this Whole thing get excited get pumped or don't I don't really care. That's it. I love you guys Maybe I'll see you at Coachella peace out Love you also I'm going to Playlist Live so maybe I'll see you there too.

Okay. Bye Orlando Playlist Live Orlando, Playlist Live Orlando  .

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